I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
My neighbor caught me peeing on his rose bushes at 2 in the morning while wearing my Santa hat. My sex appeal has never been higher.
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Randomize