You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
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I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
Randomize