Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
well, you know. whores of a feather.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
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