What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
I think I just sharted jello shots
Randomize