You drunk yet?
Nope. Give me two hours then delete my texts before you read them.
Cant make any promises.
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
Randomize