There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
there's paper in my vomit.
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
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