The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
You filled up my voicemail with a slurred but graphic depiction of how you were humping a fire hydrant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
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