ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
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You showed up at my apartment after 3 am wasted with a plate of cookies and tried to hook up.
Sorry about that. Except for the cookies.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
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We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
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