He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
I'm always impressed by your drunken ability to quickly gauge how long it's been since you've shaved and whether or not your prospective hook up will care.
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
I donkey kicked that mother fucker. Never stood a chance.
It was a door. A completely inanimate object, of course it didn't stand a chance you idiot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
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