I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.
I'm a corrupt cop.
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize