i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
Randomize