I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
Randomize