Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
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