She announced her abortion via fbk
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
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