having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
two words...techno handjob
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
Randomize