i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
He was all “please don’t bail because I’m missing work for this” last night
Honey no, I need dick. I’m not going to bail
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