Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
My boss followed me on Twitter. Excuse me while I delete 90% of my tweets
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
Randomize