Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
You almost hooked up with 200lb woman in her mid-forties, because you were convinced she was adele. Your drinking problem is officially out of control.
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
Had a dream last night that we survived the apocalypse. And we celebrated Christmas.
What did I get you?
A 12 gauge and a bottle of vodka that was waist high.
Sounds about right
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
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