Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
Randomize