you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
Heybabeimwearingurpanties
He's doing the 1:45AM lap: he goes around the bar, finds the hottest crying girl 15 minutes before close, and brings her home. I would feel bad for the girls if it wasn't such incredible genius.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Randomize