I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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