I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
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