FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
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I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
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Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
did you just send me my own nude
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
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