I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
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I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
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I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
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