It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
so they are in my phone as twin 1 and twin 2. but i forget which is which. did i put them in order of who I hooked up with first, or who is sexier? cause i'm not trying to text the one with the girlfriend
1st off, theyre identical. 2ndly, have i ever told you that youre a huge slut? hope that helps
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
Randomize