There's an amish chick decked out in amish clothes on a cell phone staring at me.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
Randomize