So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
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