So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
Banned from zoo.
Again?
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
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