now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
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