Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
I think my moral compass just broke
Randomize