Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
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