her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
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