I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
Im really high right now and the vending machine is broken and giving out free candy. Please kill me, my life will never get better than this
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
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