Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
pop tarts are not kleenex
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
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