The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
Hey I consider Sunday's trip to the ER a success. You're alive and now you know for sure you're not pregnant. I got my highest ever Tetris score. Wins all around.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
Real life skills section of my resume: blow jobs, food knowledge trivia, sarcasm, mascaera application, sexting, tolerance of rail liquors
Randomize