Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
Randomize