K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
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