It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
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