..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
so you know how i got laid the other night? well a condom just came out of me and i dont know whether to be grossed out or happy
i am grossed the fuck out
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
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I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
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