i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
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I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
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we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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