i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Randomize