I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
Dude, I just cut my asshole on the new toilet paper. If you rationed the grocery money to buy drugs, I better be getting some.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
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