Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
My one night stand asked me out to dinner. When he came to pick me up I got in the back seat. I thought he sent an uber. Awkward.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
Randomize