I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
In America we eat man semen.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
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