I never want to see another naked old woman again.
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
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