"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
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