Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
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