There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
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