its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
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