dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
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I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
I just woke up to three voicemails from you. In the first one you just straight laughed for 3 minutes. In the second you did bird calls. In the third you were hysterically crying. Have fun last night?
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
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